When I wrote the previous post, I was really speaking metaphorically. I meant that about life in general. Not specifically about speeding bulldozers or lorries. I guess my left leg didn't quite realize that, as it tried to accelerate turning left, from the left side of a lorry which was also turning left. Luckily, I ended up with a barely visible set of scratches, thanks to a lorry's really large set of tires. The insurance claim for the previous mishap hasn't come through yet. I don't even think they would have processed another, simultaneous-to-the-last-one claim from me.
Now, onto driving issues that are other people's fault. Myself and Mr. Raj
were driving towards The Forum one fine evening and as always on that road (whose name I can't quite remember) at the point where the divider ends, there were idiots crammed onto the wrong side of the road. There was this one particular auto that was almost completely on my side. I eased into the side, lowered the window and yelled at the guy - fuckface, I believe is what I said. I've been told that my 'angry traffic glare' is quite scary, but apparently it was too dark that night and all I got was a blank look. But I did
get a reaction out of his passenger - a petite woman shrouded in a mysterious stole
. She looked positively frightened. So in case you were in an auto on Wednesday evening, and while at a signal some shady looking guy in a Scarlet Rage Getz, came really close, lowered his window and screamed 'Fuckface', you need look no further for the character in question - and yours truly is sorry to have given you that scare.
The lesson I learnt there was that I need to come up with something that Kannada speaking auto wallahs will understand. Mr. Raj, for those who know him well, has a rather significant tendency to abuse the term 'bite me'. As we walked back to the car from Firangi Paani, after a nice evening with rather excellent company, I enquired what the Kannada translation of that would be. Pat came the reply -
Namge Bite Maadi.
And there ladies and gentlemen, you have the quintessential retort, worthy of a classy upbringing, localized for the current geographic. Useful against auto wallahs and other vermin detailed elsewhere